Saturday, 29 August 2009

Dickensian Boy

Lit by the harsh florescent light
A smile thins his lips
momentarily disturbing the route
of a glinting spoon piled
with cereal.

A bowl balances the scene
jauntily held
in statement more than purpose.

He glides into the classroom
to an open desk
in simulated nonchalance,
discarding the bowl noiselessly
on the Formica surface.

An exhibit in a freak show
created to obscure
a mundane life.

Out of our time he floats among us
long enough
to assert his oddball brilliance
without a hint of irony
in his sunken eyes and glib persona.

He scries oratory delights on
crinkled scraps of paper tied together
with a blue shoelace.

Where does he go when he leaves us?
Delving the depths of obscurity,
hands buried in patched pockets
of a gentleman’s blazer.
Hunched against the tide of modernity.

An over intellectualized ghost
of a personality hiding behind
his clever words and witty rhetoric.


This poem is based on a purely fictional character. Any resemblance to a person living or dead is coincidental and unintended!!

JC

2 comments:

  1. when fiction meets reality ;)
    sure thing...

    I really like this (makes my insides laugh)
    definitely paints a picture, although I feel I have a good one in my head to start with... mayhaps!
    some might call it tongue-in-cheek, but sod it, it works!
    hehehe

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  2. This poem really paints a picture - it shows us this image of a 'intellectualized ghost' that appears to the reader from the page.

    I really like it and can understand where your inspiration for the piece came from?

    But just a couple of notes (don't I always) - I am not sure about the line 'Where does he go when he leaves us?' as I feel up to this point the writer is telling us about this character and that it somehow takes away the strength of the narrative by putting in a question. Maybe you should re word this line to make the reader wonder where he goes without asking the question.

    And - have you thought about playing about with the layout. Some of the lines are so strong e.g. 'An exhibit in a freak show created to obscure a mundane life.' maybe they would be even more powerful if it was presented with longer lines in short verses. I am not sure about this but maybe you should have a play?

    Hope these ideas help because obviously remember 'I am your 'shortly to be published' poetry friend!!!!'

    But no seriously a great piece - great balance of seriousness and humour, great pictures in words.

    Mog

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